Australian culture (see: Petri dish)

Known locally as "The Cock Sucker", one of our roving reporters spotted this quality establishment in the heart of down-town Melbourne. With a handle like that it makes you wonder just what kind of amber nectar they drink down under.

Mind you, this business is a bit of a dream come true - not only is it a tavern, for sinking a few cold ones, but it has en-suit TAB (betting shop) for laying a few quid on the televised cougar mud wrestling that allegedly takes place near by, and it's an offie where you can pick up a slab of beer with your winnings on the way home - what more could an Aussie bloke dream of?!

Keeping up appearances

It's official - Jim Beam is the new Red Bull - our antipodean reporter recently scooped a real hot one when he spotted Camo negotiating the finer point's of a new sponsorship deal with this excellent beverage's marketing gurus!! You heard it here first! Welcome to the new face of international hang gliding (sorry Jonny!)

Respec!

Incredible Sex & Rapid Weight Loss

In a starteling sponsorship deal, unique in the world of hang gliding, Swiss Nick's new year's resolution has seen him take the bull by the horns and get to work on loosing his spare tyre and love-handles so that he can prance about the beach in his posing pouch in confidence once again... and have fun doing it!

Roberto's epic tail of "How I did It" (loose weight through magic sex) has been faithfully recorded in a new 'self-help for the helpless' range of personal improvement titles, which you too can benefit from... and have a lot of fun along the way! The full title of Nick's book is "The 4-Hour Body - an uncommon guide to rapid fat-loss, incredible sex and being superhuman!" And indeed it seems to work, because just a few weeks after starting his new regime you would hardly recognise him...

Whatever about the weight-loss, it certainly seems that even he can't keep his hands off himself - not even in flight! Sensational legs!

Stiffening the tip-batten Down Under

 

Exhausted after the epic flying at Forbes last week, aspiring world champion Skuffy O'Neill was on the hunt for some local 'culture' during an R & R break in Melbourne recently and happened upon this tasteful, gentleman's establishment in one of the seedier parts of town.

It's a well known fact that Aussie Shielas can be a bit rough in the looks department and are often referred to as Cougars (they can smell fresh meat at a thousand yards - and once they get their claws into you, you've had it!) but Rhinos??? Woof... that's scary!