The English 'Stiff Upper Lip'

A lesbian maid of Khartoum
Took a nancyboy up to her room.
As she turned out the light, she said:
"Lets get things right. Who does what, and with which, and to whom?!" 

Tony Stephens: "Take a walk on the wild side!"

On a recent stop-over in Thailand, British Open Champion, Tony Stephens (no doubt aided and abetted by less scrupulous 'elements') decided to sample the delights of Bangkok and see what exotic thrills were to be had during a night out on the town.  Like kids in a candy store, Tony and his mates trawled the streets of Sin City, crawling from bar to bar and slowly getting drunker and drunker... their resistance getting weaker and weaker... until finally their inhibitions seemed to evaporate into the warm, scented night air (or possibly it was the drugs!)

Having spent the early part of the evening getting a few beers on board (a lad needs a little Dutch Courage before giving in to the inevitable... even if 'the inevitable' is forcing it's tongue down his throat... or so I'm told!) and fighting off hoards of sexy, rice powered LBFMs, Tony and his mates turned on the English charm, and soon everyone in the party had one or more 'me so horny' babes all over them.

Tony's little hotty, a lithe, tanned wet-dream in anyone's book, had a curious curl at the corner of her smile as she eyed up her latest trick. "I know what you want" she whispered in Tony's glowing ear, "but I'm not what you think I am!" Fuck me, thought Tony, I'm going to need CPR by the end of the night, this one looks like she could suck the chrome off a tow-hitch! Switching on the old 'Stephens' charm' Tony gets up, puts his arm around his victim, knocks off the last of his pint and says "Right love, lets go - you've pulled! I want you to do unimaginable things to me... all night... until I pass out!" "Ok, lover boy" she purred in a husky, steamy voice, dripping with promise, "but I'm not what you think I am!!" and grabbing Tony's free hand, slides it down the front of her jeans. Heads turned as Tony's empty pint glass slipped from his grasp and smashed on the floor, puzzled to see a look of stunned shock on his face, followed by a 'what the fuck do I do now?' expression.

We'll spare Tony any further blushes and won't reveal what happened next, or how he handled the six inch dilemma he was now holding in his hot, sweaty mitt... suffice it to say that boys will be boys... and ladyboys will be ladyboys!!

Thanks to Wayne Thompson, Tony's (ex)best mate for this little pearl!